It will be hard to fully articulate how it's possible that I failed to reach my goal and yet I don't feel like a failure. I've been trying to write this post in my head for a few days now.
On Tuesday of last week, I set aside Whole30 for a good part of the afternoon and evening. Our family business turned 1, and we were having an open house celebration. See that brie in the picture? That brie was so worth the "cheating." The high quality cheeses, wine, and homemade shortbread were cheat-worthy. The tater tot I swiped from my daughter that evening? Not worth it! It was a simple but profound lesson and I am thankful to have learned it.
So I cheated on Tuesday. All hope was not lost. I was back on the straight and narrow on Wednesday. But then I had the chance to catch up with a dear friend while our boys were at Vacation Bible School. And yes, we could have just gone for coffee and I could have stayed within the Whole30 parameters. But we both wanted chips and guacamole and margaritas. Cheat-worthy. (Even though she and I make much better guacamole at home!)
So two days of cheating in a row eventually became tossing in my towel, but not in defeat or surrender. I simply didn't want to obsess over all this anymore. Life is short, food is good, and I want to enjoy both. I think that Whole30 has given me some fresh perspective and motivation to change my relationship with food. I make better choices now than I did 18 days ago. I'm not the emotional eater that I was 18 days ago.
I'm seven pounds lighter than I was 18 days ago. Areas of my body that I thought could only change when I become a runner (read, NEVER) have changed. My shorts that were tight at the beginning of summer are baggy now. My coffee tastes better without sugar (but oh mama, I missed half-and-half!). We're making better choices as a family. My oldest son has been motivated to eat more healthfully. My PVC's, which I was getting nightly, only occurred twice while I was on the program. I never got to "tiger's blood," but I did experience an increase in energy.
And beyond the physical changes, I can understand why my cousin called this the most important thing he's ever done for his spiritual life. On day 13, in the middle of a particularly trying day, all I wanted was to check out and have it easy for 10 minutes. But the two things I turn to when I'm stressed- food, and mindless Facebooking, weren't there. It was so tempting to let my mind and my flesh take over. But God was gracious to me. He met me in my weakness and gave me perspective.
So do you see why it's hard to feel like a failure?
What has this series been like for you? Are you motivated to give Whole30 a try?
I hope you've seen that if I can do this (for 12 days!), so can you.
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